I Miss Looking For My “PLUCK” – It’s Making Me “Feel So Lonesome I Could Cry

A Personal Note

My wife and I just finished binging the ten-episode Public Broadcasting System (PBS) series Country Music by Ken Burns which chronicles country music from the beginnings through the early 2000s.

It is really a fascinating 20 hour long series. While watching something resonated inside me. It reminded me that earlier in my life I had been looking for my “PLUCK” and still haven’t found it. Most importantly and sadly, I have given up looking for it.

First, let me mention my definition of “PLUCK.”

It’s when you listen to a piece of music, read a poem, read a passage from a book, watch a painting, see a memorable scene on television or a movie and something PLUCKS that core within, like a guitar string inside you that seems to connect your soul to your spinal cord, heart, gut, your nerves, your blood vessels — all at the same time. As that inner guitar string vibrates from the pluck, your mind — your soul — moves to a transcendent space — pure emotion, yet beyond emotion — this space in the world of spirit wells up within you — triggering something pure — melting the world inside you — around you — causing your soul and your insides to tremble — melting you so you either cry or wish you were crying — as that inner guitar string plucks — and the feeling vibrates — the pure emotion RULES!

And you know you just experienced something extraordinary and special.

I got reminded of the PLUCK when viewing that “Country Music” documentary series because, even though I have never been a music enthusiast, I did remember some songs which had evoked the PLUCK within me. One song, by Hank Williams. “I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry,” has plucked me for years… plucks me every time I hear it … when Elvis sings it, it plucks me almost as much as hearing Hank Williams sing it … Small wonder to me the series dubbed its episode featuring Hank Williams as the “Hillbilly Shakespeare.”

The series pointed out songs by other artists which have also plucked me in the past.

When I heard those songs, I remembered that at one time, I felt there was a PLUCK inside of me, and if I kept writing my fiction, maybe someday the PLUCK would emerge. Nothing spectacular — a passage, a scene, a phrase or a couple of phrases which, when read, might pluck something inside me and if I’m lucky, someone else.

After all, I think that’s what every writer wants to do. Yeah, some write to make money and that’s what I do sometimes even when I dabble in my fiction, but deep down, my goal is to find the PLUCK, capture it and then share it. If I can do that, then stuff money.

I am a technical writer who writes a specialized form of technical writing, but my heart leans toward admiration for the creative side. At times in my smallish fiction writing career, I have come close to writing stuff which I thought might develop into a PLUCK, but I have never achieved a PLUCK.

Since COVID limited my movements, I started accepting more technical writing gigs and disavowed my creative side until it feels like I don’t have the time or energy to pursue my fiction. It doesn’t hurt I am good at the technical writing in my little niche.

In these days of inflation, I hesitate to pull back on my technical writing gig and the six figures I finally earned last year (best year ever). But I must admit the yearning, the desire, the pull — to start once again working on my fiction in search of the elusive PLUCK is very, very strong.

One part of me wants to end up like the person in the country song, “Today, He Stopped Loving Her,” where the narrative goes: “Today, Ed Stopped Looking For His PLUCK.”

That would mean I had made the decision and acted upon it to cut back on my technical writing so I could once again start searching for the PLUCK with my fiction.

Do I have it in me to refuse financially comfortable (“paid”) technical writing assignments or not?

I frankly don’t know the answer but do know I am facing one of the constant deadlines always contained with my technical writing, so for today, it is back to the wonderful world of seeking Government contracts for my clients.

I honestly do NOT have the answer as to whether I will begin that search again.

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Dear reader, if you have made it this far, what about you?

Are you able to search for your own PLUCK?

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Thank you for reading.

And please, always,

Stay In The Light!

April 25, 2022

Overcoming the “Dark Night of the Soul” Series — Part Six — How To Encourage Yourself To Take On New Activities/Challenges

Almost everyone gets a sense of nervousness when they take on a new activity or challenge; some may see it as more a sense of excitement, while others see it as more a sense of anxiety or dread. This latter group may attempt to avoid new activities or challenges as much as possible but doing that will hinder this group in its ability to achieve the greatness they can truly achieve because it prevents them from attaining new skills, new experiences, and a new sense of self-esteem and self-confidence from taking on that activity or challenge. Therefore, if you are part of that latter group and try to avoid taking on new activities or challenges, how do you encourage yourself to do so so that you can grow as an individual and achieve your greatest potential?

One thing you can do is to take a deep breath and relax. Don’t fret over the new activity or challenge and think that you must do it perfectly or else something bad is going to happen. Most mistakes are forgivable, especially when you are trying something new and have never done such an activity before. Mistakes can and should be considered as “learning tools” that enable you to learn more about yourself, gain new skills and experience, and essentially help you move closer to achieving your best potential possible.

The second thing you can do is to look upon the new activity or challenge as something fun to test yourself, sort of like a competition. See how well you do the activity or challenge, then reward yourself afterward for the effort you put in, even if you didn’t do the activity or challenge perfectly or as well as you expected. By going through the experience, you will grow as an individual and enable yourself to reach your greatest potential possible.

The third thing you can do is to see the new activity or challenge as a “break” from the norm. You know you can do specific things in your field/industry well; now, you get to see what you can do with tasks or activities that are not in your everyday activities. See the new activity or challenge as a “vacation” from the ordinary, everyday activities and enjoy the experience. By seeing this new activity or challenge as a “vacation” or respite from the usual, you’ll enjoy the experience more, want to take on more activities or challenges more often, and be able to grow more as an individual and reach your best potential and greatness.

April 21, 2022

Overcoming the “Dark Night of the Soul” Series — Part Four — How Fear Stops You From Achieving Greatness

To achieve greatness, you must be willing to grow as an individual and improve yourself. To grow as an individual and improve yourself, you must be willing to expand your skill set and be willing to have many experiences that can improve this skill set. This means that you cannot be afraid to challenge yourself, take reasonable risks, and stepping outside of your “comfort zone.” If you are fearful, you will not reach the greatness you can achieve.

Many people are fearful and hesitant to step outside of their “comfort zones,” preferring to do things that they are familiar with. They prefer to do activities and stay in fields that they are comfortable in, that they know they do well in. Few people prefer to step outside of those zones to try something new, handle new, etc. for a few reasons. One reason is because they fear they will not do well with the new activity or challenge. A second reason is fear of embarrassment because other people may see them struggle with this new activity or challenge. A third reason is that they fear ridicule from people because they struggle with this new activity or challenge.

Fearing taking on new challenges or activities for any of the above reasons or any similar reasons only keeps you from achieving the greatness you can achieve. By not challenging yourself with new tasks and challenges, you will be unable to grow as an individual because you will not learn any new skills to add your skill set. You will continue to excel and be productive in the skills you know, but you won’t expand your skill set to grow as an individual and possibly be even more productive and capable than you currently realize. This is a key reason why you won’t achieve the greatness you are capable of; you won’t even know if you’ll find a better skill you can use to achieve greater goals and accomplishments if you don’t take on new tasks and challenges.

Therefore, fear can stop you from achieving greatness because it hinders your growth as an individual and prevents you from learning more about yourself and increasing your skill set and abilities to handle various tasks and challenges. By being willing to overcome that fear and challenging yourself with new tasks and challenges that get you out of your “comfort zone,” you can grow as an individual and be able to achieve the greatness you can achieve.

Thank you for reading.

April 12, 2022April 13, 2022

Overcoming the “Dark Night of the Soul” Series

Part One – How Learning From Successes Can Boost Your Self-Esteem

This is Part One of a Ten Part series on how to overcome the depressing “Dark Night of the Soul” that some writers and others experience.

Learning from successes can boost your self-esteem because you can learn more about yourself and your strengths. Virtually everyone excels in at least one area (often more than one area); this can help you to learn where your best skills lie and to do more activities that enable you to take advantage of these advanced skills more often.

When you do something well, you feel a sense of accomplishment, pride, and confidence surge in you because you were able to achieve something that either helped yourself and/or helped others. In many cases, you were the best person for the task and were more easily able to achieve it than other people would have. Therefore, other people will look up to you because you were able to complete the task and/or achieve the feat so quickly and easily as compared to others.

When you are having a difficult time or struggling with challenges, it is important to look back upon your successes and realize that you have the capability of doing great things and succeeding at whatever you are doing. Sometimes, life “throws us a curveball” that makes us uncomfortable and causes us to struggle a bit with tasks that we are not used to completing and have a hard time completing at a high level.

The key is that we must remember that even during these difficult times, we have the capability to adapt and succeed. Reflect back on those times when you’ve had successes, especially those tasks that others struggled and they called upon you to do them. Whether it was an issue with a computer or electronic device, an item at home that needed repairing, or just offering helpful advice to someone dealing with a situation you dealt with before, you were able to succeed where others couldn’t or would have a harder time succeeding.

By reflecting on your past successes and realizing you have the capability to adapt and do many tasks well, you will realize that whatever present challenge you’re facing can be overcome as well. You just have to focus on the task at hand, utilize the lessons you’ve learned from having past successes, and put the work in to overcome the present challenge. By taking time to reflect and learn from your past successes, you can keep your self-esteem during times of great difficulty and be able to overcome virtually any challenge that comes your way.

Thank you for reading